Each meeting covers one lesson. The passage, questions and notes are all on the lesson page, and group members can print their own copy.
Leaders need only this guide: first the flow that is the same every time, then the focus points and tips for each lesson.
A lesson takes about an hour. Meet weekly or every other week — whatever fits your group.
Each Meetingabout 55 min
Snacks and catching up
10 min
Read together
10 min
Discussion
25 min
This week
5 min
Close (prayer optional)
5 min
Opening: Start with last time’s ‘This week’: ‘Did you do it? How did it go?’ For the first lesson, ask everyone to say in one sentence why they want to read about this person. The leader goes first.
Read together: Take turns reading the passage, a few verses each. The leader reads the short notes between sections.
Discussion: You don’t need to discuss every question in ‘Think It Through.’ Pick one or two from each group, add this lesson’s focus points, and that is plenty.
This week: Read it together, and ask each person to decide on the one small thing they will do this week.
Close: You can pray using a verse from the lesson. If some aren’t used to praying aloud, a minute of silence together is fine too.
Lesson 1 · Let It Be Done to Me According to Your WordLuke 1:26-38
Focus 1 (vv. 29–38): Mary “was greatly troubled at the saying, and considered what kind of salutation this might be”; she asked, “How can this be?”; in the end she said, “let it be done to me according to your word.” Ask the group: reading these verses, what do you see?
Focus 2 (questions 7–8): Ask each person to say what comes to mind as they read verse 37 and verse 30 — the leader does not draw the conclusion for the group, and the group does not need to agree.
Focus 3 (This week): Everyone thinks of one thing they do not understand right now and tells God about it honestly every day this week. This does not need to be shared in the group.
Leader tip: Members may come from different church traditions, with different views of Mary and different ways of speaking of her. This lesson only reads what the passage records. Read “Rejoice, you highly favored one!” and “Blessed are you among women!” (v. 28) as the passage gives them; there is no need to develop them into a special status for Mary, and no need to play them down. If someone raises any church’s teaching about Mary, the leader can say that it is not discussed here. In this lesson she is called simply ‘Mary’. Read verses 34–35 as the passage gives them; there is no need to discuss what science says, or to defend the passage. There is no need to say how old she was, or to supply her inner feelings — the passage records only that “she was greatly troubled at the saying, and considered what kind of salutation this might be” (v. 29). Don’t discuss how people then would have seen a woman who became pregnant before marriage; someone in the group may have lived through something similar, or been shamed for it. Read Mary’s question in verse 34 as the passage gives it; don’t call it ‘a lack of faith’. Don’t press on questions 9 and 10; only those who want to share need to; ‘I can’t say it yet’ is an acceptable answer to question 10.
Focus 1 (vv. 46–49): Mary’s song begins, “My soul magnifies the Lord”; she says God “has looked at the humble state of his servant”, and “he who is mighty has done great things for me.” Ask the group: reading these verses, what do you see?
Focus 2 (questions 7–8): Ask each person to say what comes to mind as they read verse 48, and verses 50 and 54–55 — the leader does not draw the conclusion for the group, and the group does not need to agree.
Focus 3 (This week): Everyone writes a few lines to God this week, beginning with one thing God has done for them. Next time, anyone who wants to can read theirs.
Leader tip: Read “Blessed are you among women” (v. 42), “the mother of my Lord” (v. 43), and “all generations will call me blessed” (v. 48) as the passage gives them — the first two are Elizabeth’s words, the third is from the song; there is no need to develop them into a special status for Mary, and no need to play them down. If someone raises any church’s teaching on these words, the leader can say that it is not discussed here. Read verses 51–53 as the passage gives them: the song is speaking of what God has done; don’t turn it into any political or social position, or into ‘God will turn your life around’, and there is no need to decide which people today are ‘the proud’ or ‘the rich’. Read the baby leaping (vv. 41, 44) as the passage gives it; there is no need to explain it. Verse 56 says she stayed about three months; the passage does not say why, or what happened when she went home, and there is no need to fill that in. Hannah’s prayer in 1 Sam 2:1 is only set alongside; there is no need to say Mary modelled her song on Hannah’s. Don’t press on questions 9 and 10; only those who want to share need to.
Lesson 3 · She Kept All These Sayings in Her HeartLuke 2:41-52
Focus 1 (vv. 48–51): Mary said, “your father and I were anxiously looking for you”; Jesus said, “Didn’t you know that I must be in my Father’s house?”; the passage says, “They didn’t understand the saying which he spoke to them”, and “his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.” Ask the group: reading these verses, what do you see?
Focus 2 (questions 7–8): Ask each person to say what comes to mind as they read verse 49 and verse 52 — the leader does not draw the conclusion for the group, and the group does not need to agree.
Focus 3 (This week): Everyone writes down one thing they still do not understand, and brings it to God in prayer every day this week. This does not need to be shared in the group.
Leader tip: Someone in the group may be a parent worried about a child, or may have had a child go missing or leave home; don’t ask the group to imagine Mary’s feelings during those three days, and don’t turn this lesson into ‘how to manage your children’. Read Mary’s words in verse 48 and “They didn’t understand the saying which he spoke to them” (v. 50) as the passage gives them: don’t say she lacked faith, don’t say she failed as a mother, and don’t say she was slow to understand. Read ‘my Father’s house’ in verse 49 as the passage gives it; there is no need to develop it into doctrine, and no need to explain the difference between ‘your father’ in verse 48 and ‘my Father’ in verse 49. Before We Begin quoted Simeon’s words, “Yes, a sword will pierce through your own soul” (Luke 2:35); there is no need to stop on them here, as the next lesson comes back to them. The “feeding trough, because there was no room for them in the inn” (Luke 2:7) in Before We Begin is only background; there is no need to turn it into a story of rejection. Don’t press on questions 9 and 10; only those who want to share need to.
Focus 1 (vv. 25–27): “Standing by Jesus’ cross were his mother” and others (v. 25); Jesus said to her, “Woman, behold, your son!”, and to the disciple, “Behold, your mother!”; and the disciple took her to his own home. Ask the group: reading these verses, what do you see?
Focus 2 (questions 7–8): Ask each person to say what comes to mind as they read verses 26–27 and verse 30 — the leader does not draw the conclusion for the group, and the group does not need to agree.
Focus 3 (This week): Everyone thinks of someone who is ‘standing by’ right now, and goes to see them or calls them this week. Next time, anyone who wants to can share.
Leader tip: Someone in the group may have lost a child. Don’t ask the group to imagine being Mary, don’t describe what she felt, and there is no need to go into the details of suffering on the cross. Read verses 26–27 as the passage gives them: don’t turn them into ‘Mary the mother of the church’, or into ‘Jesus teaches us to honour our parents’. In WEB Jesus addresses her as ‘Woman’ (v. 26; John 2:4); there is no need to explain the tone of the word, and don’t make it sound cold or make it a title. The passage does not give the name of “the disciple whom he loved” (v. 26) here; there is no need to name him. There is no need to count whether three or four women stood in verse 25, or to work out who “his mother’s sister” (v. 25) was. Simeon’s words in Luke 2:35 and verse 25 are only read side by side; there is no need to say ‘this is the fulfilment’. Read verses 28–30 as the passage gives them; this is Mary’s lesson, and “It is finished!” (v. 30) does not need to be developed into doctrine. Read John 2:4 and Mark 3:31-35 in Before We Begin as the passage gives them; there is no need to explain the tone of Jesus’ words, and don’t turn them into ‘Jesus did not care for his mother’ or ‘Mary did not believe either’. After Acts 1:14 the passage records nothing more of her; there is no need to add where she lived later or how she died. Different churches’ teachings about Mary are not discussed here. Don’t press on questions 9 and 10; only those who want to share need to. Question 11 looks back; allow ten minutes for it.
Principles
The leader is not a teacher, but someone walking alongside everyone else.
Give everyone a chance to speak. If some talk a lot, you can gently say, ‘Let’s hear from those who haven’t spoken yet.’
Don’t rush to give answers. If there is silence, wait a few more seconds.
If you can’t answer a question, it’s fine to say, ‘I don’t know — let’s look into it together,’ and come back to it next time.
What is said in the group stays in the group.
At the start, the leader can share their own answer first. Keep it simple and honest.
In the lessons, words in double quotes with a reference are scripture. What the passage does not say, we can only guess; guessing is fine, as long as we say we are guessing.
Don’t press on painful things. If someone becomes upset, stay with them after the meeting; if needed, involve a pastor from their church or a professional counselor.